Bagong Rule sa Suspension ng Classes Kapag May Bagyo

kulitan sa ofis, usapan kung suspended ba ang classes: bagong rule ng suspension ng classes or work. Di na daw by elem, hs or college. By HEIGHT na daw dahil nakadepende ang survival sa taas ng baha...

So ito ang bagong rule:
Signal #1: walang pasok ang mga 3 ft below.

Signal #2: walang pasok ang mga 5ft below

Signal #3 and up: walang pasok sa lahat ng height level..

Weird Calculus Class

sa calculus class kanina:

"Palitan natin yung x or y.. Kahit ano naman sa dalawa pwede. Pero mas ok kung palitan natin yung x.. Kasi ex naman talaga ang pinapalitan di ba?"

Nyahaha.. :D

Pangarap Maging Kambing???

s: gusto ko lang naman ay magkaroon ng masaya at tahimik na pamilya.

m: pareho kayo ng kambing namin. Ang goal sa buhay ay magparami at magdasal na di katayin agad.

:))

Usapang Ex

usapang kasalan kanina sa office...

Isip namin kung paano magandang presentation ng pix sa gagawing video clips.. Dapat daw kasama sa slides ang pix ng EX-GF at EX-BF ng couple..

Sabi namin, "kung kayo mam C ang gagawan ng ganun, malamang 3 hours yung presentation sa dami ng EX niyo!"

:))

Kalokohan Noong Teacher's Day

s: happy teacher's day!

m: i'm not a teacher...

s: e ano ka?

m: a multi-cellular organism who goes to school and scratches green painted woods using very soft white rocks and receives money every 10th and 23rd day of the month...

s: in short, teacher!

m: please wag mo naman emphasize na short ako!

s: mauubos na lahat ng adjective pag tinanggal ko pa yung short. Tinanggal ko na nga yung 'retarded' at 'bolero' eh..

(nakakainspire talaga words of wisdom ng mga kaibigan, :D )

Havablesseday! :D

Matulungin ka ba?

may matanda kanina humihingi tulong para sa gastos sa ospital daw sa Bolingit.. Nung tatawagan na ng cofaculty ko yung hospital, biglang sinabi 'nilipat na sa Makati'..

TOINKS!!!

Di masama tumulong, pero kung di naman kapani paniwala humihingi ng tulong, tutulungan mo ba?

'ingats!', sabi nga ni John 'Lock' Lloyd.. :p

Bukas Zipper ni Sir

Sa algebra class 5-6pm..

Ako: unahan ko na kayo kasi im sure pagtsismisan ako ng iba after class.. Nasira zipper ng pants ko kaya wag kayo madistract.. Focus on the board!

Nyahaha.. Una unahan lang yan.. :p

THE BEST TOURISM ADVENTURE FROM PANGASINAN TO BAGUIO

alam mo ba na holiday ngayon sa Pangasinan-La Union-Benguet?

Triple holiday actually.. Today is Road Repair Day, Road Construction Day and Destroy the Road then Abandon Day!

Every town is celebrating and i am joining every town's parade! Ang saya saya!

Every parade is operated by a guy wearing hardhat, neon orange vest and boots.. The parade will stop or proceed depending on the raised flag of the operator.. Red for stop and green for proceed...

Most of the town organized a parade for both lanes of the road to make sure that everyone will enjoy the pleasure and fun in the parade while travelling to Baguio or Manila...

So ano pa ginagawa niyo?! Magbiyahe na at subukang maexperience ang kakaibangTurism Adventure na naghihintay sa inyo!

(lagut, im late...very late!!!)

PROBLEM SOLVING IN MATHEMATICS

Sa Algebra Night Class kanina:

Ako: (after solving the equation) S=25 and S=20.. But S is the speed of the slower runner.. Do you think both values are possible?

(silence...)

Ako: Of course possible.. 20 ft/s is the speed of the LEFT F00T and 25 ft/s is the speed of the RIGHT F00T!

Wahahaha...

MGA BAGONG MODUS NG MGA TEACHERS:

1. FILM SHOWINGS :
Magdownload si teacher videos sa youtube at ipapalabas sa auditorium at maniningil ng bente.

Yung iba para di halata, may organisasyon kunwari na magyaya sa school para sa isang 'educational' film showing SM!

Mas malaki kita dun kasi P150 to P400 ang singilan. Mas malaki kickback ni teacher!

Swerte pa kasi doble kita pag sa pre-elem ang dudugasan mo kasi pwede mo i-require mga parents or guardian ng mga students mo, DOBLE KITA!!!

2. FIELD TRIPS
Magastos nga naman mag family bonding. Kaya ang mga wais na teachers, may paraan diyan!

Magkakaroon ng field trip ang klase ni teacher.. At magugulat na lang mga students may mga tiyanak sa bus! Yun pala mga anak ni teacher, kasama buong angkan sa fieldtrip!

Pwede din kumita si teacher ng extra. Kausapin lang management ng bus na kukunin ulit serbisyo nila sa susunod na taon kapalit ang 'financial donation' sa bulsa ni teacher!

3. PROJECTS, FOLDERS AND PAPERS


Sa kagustuhang kumita ni teacher, kahit pagbebenta papasukin!

Magpapaproject si teacher at iipunin ang lahat ng sliding folders at ibebenta sa pinakamalapit na suking tindahan...

Ang mga lamang papel ng folder ay itatago ang magandang pagkakagawa para gawing project ng anak sa takdang panahon. Ang iba ay ibebenta ng per dangkal!

Pag hanapin ng student yung project, just in case hanapin lang, sasabihin ni teacher na tinatago para sa school evaluation. Lusot na!

Adventure with Pepeng

It was Friday afternoon, October 2, when the PSU Administration declared that the classes will be suspended due to the incoming typhoon Pepeng. The typhoon passed the Philippines without inflicting any damage to Pangasinan but another typhoon formed in the Pacific pulling the typhoon Pepeng back to the country and the horrendous story of devastation of some towns of Pangasinan started.

Thursday, October 8, the rain poured like the ocean is being gushed into Pangasinan and the neighboring provinces. Water volume in dams increased rapidly thus the dam administrators were forced to release water in the night giving the provincial and local officials little time to prepare and inform the local people. The unexpected large volume of water destroyed some part of the dike thus flooding the area near the damaged section. As a result, a lot of properties and crops were destroyed… and some lives were lost.

Motorboats and big trucks were sent from nearby towns to rescue those who are stranded and trapped in their rooftops. Relief goods containing rice, noodles and sardines (some include sugar, coffee and water) are coming from NGOs and some individuals. Our local officials are doing dumb things like taking pictures of them while distributing relief goods thus delaying the distribution.

The water is now subsiding and the people are starting to point fingers on who’s to blame on the disaster that happened. A lot of them are accusing the administrators of San Roque Dam for releasing a large volume of water that the dike cannot sustain. The provincial government is now filing a case against San Roque Dam administrators for the late information dissemination of the release of the large volume of water. They said that it was the poor judgment of the San Roque Administration that caused the big damage; that they should not have accepted water from other dams and not waited for the water level of the dam to reach the critical level before releasing water; and that they should have warned the local officials earlier.

Knee-level floodwater also entered our house. We stayed overnight in the nearby Digitel building... (to be continued..)

Ugoy ng Bagyo

(nakita ko nakasaulat sa likod ng mga pina-xerox na handouts nung college ako..second year ako nun malamang kasi meron 'fireplace'... natatawa ako kc dami wrong grammar... hahaha...)

The heat from the fireplace is not enough to protect me from the biting cold. Yes, the fire gives me warmth but there is something the fire cannot give. Warmth that only the person 100 kilometers away from Baguio can give.

Nais kong maulit ang dati kong araw,
Nang munti pang bata, sa piling ni nanay…

I remember my mother in in days like these, days when rain pours the whole week almost without ceasing. For her, rainy days are hard days for it means sleepless nights. She has to stay awake all night to empty the pails, casseroles, basins, big bowls and other can contain anythings. So my mother hangs plastics to catch those extra drippings.

I know how hard, tiring and exhausting what my mother is doing because I help her during Fridays. I have to keep watch everything and empty the pails, casseroles, basins, big bowls, hanged plastics and can contain anythings. I also have to squeeze out the water and mud from the rugs. I have to do these while my mother sleeps for an hour or two. But sometimes, I will let her sleep for the whole night so I will take the responsibility of keeping the house dry until morning. At my young age, I didn’t know that that getting a below average height will be a consequence of those sleepless nights. All I know is that I would not be able to watch the Saturday cartoons on TV the following day. Actually its okay for me because in my mind, God sees my helfulness so He will reward me by ordering the tv stations to air again the episodes I missed. And most of the time, the tv stations did air the episodes I missed. That is my concept of divine intervention when I was a kid.

Those Friday nights were the longest nights of my life. Add the words “most boring” when there are brownouts. I was not able to play my favorite classical music and torture my mind listening to my mother’s loud and annoying snoring. So to protect my head from exploding, I busy myself in burning old newspapers and kill the ants crawling on the wall. Poor ants..

There was a Saturday morning that my mother reprimanded me. She was very angry for not waking her up the previous night. At first, I cant understand why she is so angry. I just wanted her to have a good rest. But later, I realized that she is just concern at me, more concern than I am concern of her.

There was a time that the rain poured non-stop for almost 2 weeks. I need to accompany my mother in her vigil even though its not Friday. There was a particular night that I have to go out to make a dike so that the water will flow out from the backyard. I was soaked in the rain in that very cold night. The darkness was also straining my eyes. I can barely see the earth I am digging. But I can feel it in my feet that the water level is already above the ankle. Anytime, the water will flow into the house. So I used all of my strength to make a dike as soon as possible… but my weak body surrendered before I finished the dike.

I sat and lean my back on the wall opposite to where the wind is blowing to take some rest. Unconsciously, I threw the shovel. I heard a splash and saw it sank in the water when the lightning stroked from the sky. I was alerted because the water will flow into the house anytime if I will not finish the dike. My mother was also relying on me and I do not want all her efforts in keeping the house dry turn into vain. So with all of my remaining strength I picked up the shovel and finished the dike.

After finishing the dike, I felt so dizzy and cold that I have to use the shovel to keep my balance. I walked into the door, knocked and asked my mother for a towel and dry clothes. The door opened in no time and my mother gently pulled me inside the house.

“Close the door immediately,” she said while handing me the towel and dry clothes.

I noticed that she is holding a wire. “What are you going to do with that wire?” I asked.

“I will use it for reinforcing the roof,” my mother answered.

“How about the kerosene lamp, why are you not using it?”

“The lamp is already empty.”

Then I heard fast thugs from my mother’s feet. Maybe she realized that she has to reinforce the roof immediately or else the strong wind will carry it over to our neighbor’s backyard. I want to help her but my strength is not enough even to stand. I changed my clothes and said goodnight to my mother but I never heard a response. It is either she is too preoccupied in fastening the roof or was too weak to pronounce the words I want to hear.

My bed is now calling me. I feel like I was hypnotized and the order is to lie on my bed. Going to bed is easy even without lights because I know the house so well. I can go to bed without bumping to anything because I know where is everything… But I was wrong. Going to bed is like a thousand years of journey…

I heard a clang before my foot landed for the first step. I remember that the pails, casseroles, basins, big bowls, hanged plastics and other can-contain-anything are all around. Worse, my head is like a heavy ball attached to my neck…I feel so cold and my whole body is shivering. My knees can’t carry my body so I crawled going to bed. It was the longest and the most grueling trip in my entire life.

Sa aking pagtulog na labis ang himbing,
Ang bantay ko’y tala, and tanod ko’y bituin..

I was very tired but I can’t sleep. My whole body is shivering in cold. The blanket was not enough to warm me so I pulled another blanket. I’m sure it was my father’s blanket because it smells like him. He always smells like this, smell of perspiration dried in his skin. After I exerted a great effort to cover my body, I felt frustrated. The cold is still biting me and its fangs are penetrating my bones. But later, I realized the cold is coming from inside my body. The sound of the rain on the roof was also torturing me. It seems like it is expanding my brain. But I need to endure the noise to be able to sleep. I conditioned my mind that the fast and loud tick-tacks on the roof was Beethoven’s opus. And it worked! It was beautiful… very pleasant…I imagined myself living centuries ago and was watching and listening to Beethoven playing the piano! And with my mind relaxed, I was able to sleep… for some minutes.

“BRAAAAANG!!!”

It was not a concluding note to Beethoven’s concert piece. It was our roof sheet blown away by the strong wind.

“God help us,” I heard my mother cried. “I am already tired and nothing more to give. Please pour all the rain now and let all the wind blow tonight. I want to sleep now and please give us a good weather tomorrow.”

Then I heard my mother’s loud sob. Her cry was echoing in the house. It seems like I was also feeling the pain she is feeling because tears flowed my eyes. I heard my heart beat faster and stronger. My soul is commanding me to comfort her. I tried but I can’t move from bed. I also tried to say comforting words but only air came out of my mouth, making a soft “oooohh.”

I think my mother heard the faint sound I made because I heard the soft and slow thugs of her bare foot on the cement floor. I was never surprised because mothers have the ability to feel if their sons and daughters are in pain.

“Sleep now Buboy.” My mother said softly. “Everything will be fine tomorrow.”

“I can’t,”at last I pronounced some words.

“You have to sleep. You will not be able to listen to your favorite music or watch TV tomorrow if you will not sleep tonight.”

“I feel so cold and the noise that the raindrops on the roof…,” I was not able to finish my sentence so I covered my ears with my hands to express to my mother that the noise on the roof wont make me sleep.

“Okay, let us imagine that the rain on the roof is Beethoven playing the piano. Let us listen together as we catch our sleep,” my mother suggested while enclosing me in her arms.

I felt the warmth of her body flowing in me. It was very comforting…very caring… It was one of the greatest moments in my life in spite of what happened. It is also memorable because we listen together to Beethoven’s music with her arms around me… very memorable concert that every classical music lover will envy. Again my tears flowed from my eyes.

Sa piling ni nanay, langit ang buhay…

At my young age, I learned and was convinced that God is not a fairytale character. I was convinced that there is a God who heard and answered my mother’s prayer because the day after the night full of anguish was a fair day. I also feel good that day and was able to play with my cousins. The last thing I can remember in that day was my mother’s smiling eyes that followed as I leave the backyard. Those eyes were so calm, full of joy and saying something. How I wish at that time that I have the ability to read my mother’s mind. I am not sure but most probably it means “Thank you God for protecting us last night” or simply “Thank you God.”

Nais kong maulit ang awit ni inang mahal

Awit ng pag-ibig habang ako’y nasa duyan.

General Tips for Studying Mathematics: How to Study Math Part 2

These are some general tips that where either important enough to single out or just didn’t seem to fit into any of the other sections.

• Go To Class. Remember that math is cumulative. If you don’t go to class you will miss important material that will be used in later sections and/or important announcements.

• Get to Class On Time. Sometime important announcements are only given during the first few minutes of a class.

• LISTEN During Class. In order to get something out of the class you need to listen while in class. Often this can be difficult to do but it is very important. Sometimes important ideas will not be written down on the board, but instead just spoken by the instructor. Watch for things the instructor emphasizes, even if just in words. This often means the instructor thinks it’s important. The more important that an instructor thinks a topic is, the more likely that it will show up on the exam! 

• Take Good Notes. Try to write down everything that instructor puts on board. It may seem easy when watching the instructor, but it often is not so easy when it comes time for you to do it. A good set of notes will help remind you how to do these problems. For some instructors writing down everything may be difficult. In these cases you should try to write down as much as possible. 

Note as well that this seems to contradict the previous tip. It is often hard to both listen and take a good set of notes. This is something that one often only gains with practice. You need to be able to listen while you are writing down the important parts of the lecture.

If you find that are having trouble both listening and taking good notes then you might consider bringing in a tape recorder and record the lecture. Note however that prior to doing this you should first speak with your instructor. There are a few instructors out there in the world that do not like to have their lectures recorded. 

• Ask Questions. If you don’t understand something then ask your instructor. Chances are you are not the only one who doesn’t understand. 

• Listen When Others Ask Questions. When other students ask questions make sure you listen to both the question and the answer. It may be that the student asking the question thought of something that you didn’t think of. 

• Review Notes After Class. After each class you should review your notes. Note the topics that you found confusing and formulate questions that you can ask your instructor or tutor to help you understand the topic. 

• Make a Set of Index Cards. Make a set of index cards with important formulas and concepts on them. You can carry these around with you to look over when you’ve got a few spare minutes. Use them to help you memorize the important formulas and concepts. 

• Learn The (Proper) Notation. Instructors will assume you know it so you’ll need to and many instructors will take points off for bad notation. 

• Get Into A Study Group. It is often helpful to study in groups. People often look at things differently so someone else may see how to solve a problem that can’t do or understand a topic that you find confusing.

• Note Due Dates. Write down the due dates for homework and dates for exams someplace you’ll see them so you don’t forget about them.

• Budget Adequate Time For Studying/Homework. It often takes more time studying mathematics to learn the subject than you may require in other classes. Homework will often take more time than you had originally thought it would. Keep this in mind as you budget time. 

• Do Homework After Each Class. At the end of each class budget some time to look over the homework from that days lecture and attempt to do it Doing this will allow you time to really work at understanding the concepts covered that day. Do not wait until the last minute to do the homework as this often results in an incomplete homework set and/or an incomplete understanding of the concept.

• Do Homework Without Notes and Book. After the first few homework problems, put your notes and book up and try to do the remaining problems without referring to your notes and/or book. In most cases you will not have these during your exams so get used to doing problems without them. 

• Do More Homework. Do not limit yourself to just the homework that your instructor assigns. The more problems that you work the better off you’ll be. 

• Practice, Practice, Practice. Practice as much as possible. The only way to really learn how to do problems is work lots of them. The more you work, the better prepared you will be come exam time.

• Persevere. You will not just instantly get every topic that is covered in a math class. There will be some topics that you will have to work at before you completely understand. The only way to really grasp some topics is to go home and think about it and work some problems. You will often find that after a little work a topic that initially baffled you will all of a sudden make sense.

• Keep Old Homework and Exams. Do not throw away homework and exams once you get them back. The homework is a good source of study material for exams and both the homework and exams is a good source of study material for comprehensive final exams (if you’ve got one). 

• Don’t Forget Your Textbook. If you get stuck on a topic that was discussed in class do not forget that you do have a textbook. Often the text book will contain examples not worked in class and/or a different approach to a problem. 

• Seek Help If You Need It. If you are having trouble with your math class you have many options open to you and you should take advantage of them. You can go to your instructor’s office hours, go to the tutoring room or hire a tutor to get help.

• Have the Proper Attitude. Always do the best that you can. Do not do try to do just enough to get by. Doing this can lead to major problems if you aren’t careful. If you are trying to do just enough to get by then all it takes is one bad exam and you are now failing the course. You should always do the best that you can and strive for the best grade that you can possible get.

How to Study Mathematics Part 1

Before I get into the tips for how to study math let me first say that everyone studies differently and there is no one right way to study for a math class. There are a lot of tips in this document and there is a pretty good chance that you will not agree with all of them or find that you can’t do all of them due to time constraints. There is nothing wrong with that. We all study differently and all that anyone can ask of us is that we do the best that we can. It is my intent with these tips to help you do the best that you can given the time that you’ve got to work with.

Now, I figure that there are two groups of people here reading this document, those that are happy with their grade, but are interested in what I’ve got to say and those that are not happy with their grade and want some ideas on how to improve. Here are a couple of quick comments for each of these groups.

If you have a study routine that you are happy with and you are getting the grade you want from your math class you may find this an interesting read. There is, of course, no reason to change your study habits if you’ve been successful with them in the past. However, you might benefit from a comparison of your study habits to the tips presented here.

If you are not happy with your grade in your math class and you are looking for ways to improve your grade there are a couple of general comments that I need to get out of the way before proceeding with the tips. Most people who are doing poorly in a math class fall into three main categories.

The first category consists of the largest group of students and these are students that just do not have good study habits and/or don’t really understand how to study for a math class. Students in this category should find these tips helpful and while you may not be able to follow all of them hopefully you will be able to follow enough of them to improve your study skills.

The next category is the people who spend hours each day studying and still don’t do well. Most of the people in this category suffer from inefficient study habits and hopefully this set of notes will help you to study more efficiently and not waste time.

The final category is those people who simply aren’t spending enough time studying. Students are in this category for a variety of reasons. Some students have job and/or family commitments that prevent them from spending the time needed to be successful in a math class. To be honest there isn’t a whole lot that I can do for you if that is your case other than hopefully you will become a more efficient in your studies after you are
through reading this. The vast majority of the students in this category unfortunately, don’t realize that they are in this category. Many don’t realize how much time you need to spend on studying in order to be successful in a math class. Hopefully reading this document will help you to realize that you do need to study more. Many simply aren’t willing to make the time to study as there are other things in their lives that are more important to them. While that is a decision that you will have to make, realize that eventually you will have to take the time if you want to pass your math course. Now, with all of that out of the way let’s get into the tips. I’ve tried to break down the hints and advice here into specific areas such as general study tips, doing homework,, studying for exams, etc. However, there are three broad, general areas that all of these tips will fall into.


Math is Not a Spectator Sport
You cannot learn mathematics by just going to class and watching the instructor lecture and work problems. In order to learn mathematics you must be actively involved in the learning process. You’ve got to attend class and pay attention while in class. You’ve got to take a good set of notes. You’ve got to work homework problems, even if the instructor doesn’t assign any. You’ve got to study on a regular schedule, not just the night before exams. In other words you need to be involved in the learning process. 


The reality is that most people really need to work to pass a math class, and in general they need to work harder at math classes than they do with their other classes. If all that you’re willing to do is spend a couple of hours studying before each exam then you will find that passing most math classes will be very difficult. If you aren’t willing to be actively involved in the process of learning mathematics, both inside and outside of the class room, then you will have trouble passing any math class. 


Work to Understand the Principles
You can pass a history class by simply memorizing a set of dates, names and events. You will find, however, that in order to pass a math class you will need to do more than just memorize a set of formulas. While there is certainly a fair amount of memorization of formulas in a math class you need to do more. You need to understand how to USE the formulas and that is often far different from just memorizing them. Some formulas have restrictions on them that you need to know in order to correctly use them. For instance, in order to use the quadratic formula you must have the quadratic in standard form first. You need to remember this or you will often get the wrong answer!


Other formulas are very general and require you to identify the parts in the problem that correspond to parts in the formula. If you don’t understand how the formula works and the principle behind it, it can often be very difficult to use the formula. For example, in a calculus course it’s not terribly difficult to memorize the formula for integration by parts for integrals. However, if you don’t understand how to actually use the formula and identify the appropriate parts of the integral you will find the memorized formula worthless. 


Mathematics is Cumulative 
You’ve always got to remember that mathematics courses are cumulative. Almost everything you do in a math class will depend on subjects that you’ve previously learned. This goes beyond just knowing the previous sections in your current class to needing to remember material from previous classes. You will find a college algebra class to be very difficult without the knowledge that you learned in your high school algebra class. You can’t do a calculus class without first taking (and understanding) an Algebra and a Trigonometry class. 


So, with these three main ideas in mind let’s proceed with some more specific tips to studying for a math class. Note as well that several of the tips show up in multiple sections since they are either super important tips or simply can fall under several general topics.

Sa Maalikabok na Daan ng Cabuggao

Mababa na ang araw subalit mahapdi pa rin sa balat ang sinag nito. Pero sige lang, lakad lang. Mamaya makakarating din sa paroroonan.


Labindalawa? Sampu? Labinlima? Hindi ko na alam kung ilan kami. Hindi ko na binilang. Basta marami kami. Paano ko naman kasi mabibilang, napakagulo nila. Lahat gustong mapunta sa harapan. Lahat ayaw maalikabukan. Siguro ayaw na rin nilang madagdagan ng alikabok ang pawis at mga makakating bagay na nanggagaling sa maisang pumapalibot sa amin.


Naiinis na nga ako sa mga nasa unahan. Parang ang bibigat ng mga paa nila. Parang wala silang pakialam sa mga nasa likod nila. Parang hindi nila alam na nasa likod nila kami. Parang galit sila sa aming nasa likuran. Parang… parang… parang…


Patuloy ang aming paglakad…


Lakad…


Lakad. Naalala ko ang sinabi sa akin ng isang matangdang nakausap ko. Mas madalas pa raw pumatak ang pawis at luha dito sa Cabuggao kaysa ang ulan. Enero pa raw sila huling dinalaw ng ulan subalit ang pawis ay araw-araw at ang luha ay gabi-gabi. Buti na lang daw marunong silang pahirin ang mga pawis at luha dahil kung hindi ay matagal nang lubog sa baha ang Cabuggao.


“Hayaan po ninyo, ipagdarasal ko na matigil na ang ulan,” naalala koong sinabi ko matapos ang ilang sandali ng katahimikan na sumingit sa aming pag-uusap.


Nabigla siya sa aking nabanggit at sa unang pagkakataon ay nangusap siya sa aking mga mata. Bakas sa kanyang mga mata ang pinaghalong pagtatanong at pagdududa. Ang mga titig niya sa akin ay mga titig na nagtatanong. Pero hindi ko maintindihan ang kanyang nais malaman…


Dumaloy na lang ang kanyang mga luha sa tila parating pagod niyang mga mata at doon ko naintindihan ang kanyang nais ipahiwatig. Ang ilang patak ng luha niya ay sapat na upang maintindihan ko ang kanyang pagdaramdam…


Hinayaan ko na lamang ang katahimikan na sumingit muli sa aming pag-uusap. Ayaw ko nang magsalita pa. Wala naman akong maipapayo sa kanya. Mas kilala niya ang Cabuggao at lubos na mas marami siyang karanasan sa akin. Baka pagtawanan lang niya ako kung pinayuhan ko siya. Kaya hinayaan ko na lang ang luha ko ang tumugon sa kanya. Ang ilang patak na dumaloy sa aking mga mata ay sapat na upang maramdaman niya ang aking pakikiramay sa kanila…


Nag-uumpisa nang magbago ang kulay ng araw…


Saan na nga ba kami pupunta? Hindi ko na maalala… Sige lang sunod na lang nang sunod.


Puno na ng alikabok ang ilong ko at makati na rin ang balat ko kaya nakipag-unahan na rin ako papauntang unahan. Habang nilalampasan ko ang aking mga kasama, napansin ko ang kanilang mga mukha. May nakasuot ng mukhang masaya, mayroong sabik na sabik na makarating na sa aming paroroonan, mayroon ding pagod, naguguluhan, may walang pakialam at mayroon nang gustong bumalik sa aming tinutuluyan. Hindi ko na pinansin ang ibang mukha. Ang mahalaga sa akin ay mapunta sa unahan… kung saan walang nakakairitang alikabok.


Patuloy ang paglakad…


Lakad…


Sa wakas, nakarating din ako sa unahan.


Masarap dito sa unahan, walang alikabok ang nilalanghap mong hangin. Kaya lang, nakakatakot kasi hindi mo alam kung saan ang tamang daan…


Sa totoo lang, naguguluhan na ako. Hindi sa kung saan kami pupunta kundi sa laman ng isip ko ngayon. Ilang araw na kami sa Cabuggao pero ang pakiramdam ko ay wala ako dito. Palagi ko kasing iniisip kung ano ang nangyari sa closing ceremony ng mga kapatid ko.


Magtatapos na ng high school ang sumusunod sa akin. Sariwa pa sa aking isipan ang huli naming pagkikita bago ako umalis papuntang Cabuggao. Iniabot ko muna sa kanya ang aking regalo bago ako umalis. Wala siyang imik na inabot ang aking regalo pero ang laman ng kanyang maikling sulat ang umaalingawngaw sa aking tenga habang ako ay nasa bus.


“Kuya gusto kong malaman mo na hindi ako magdaramdam kahit na wala kang regalo sa akin basta nandoon ka lang makita ko kayo ni nanay at tatay na papalakpak sa akin pagkaabo ko ng diploma. Sapat na ang inyong palakpak upang ako ay maging lubos na masaya sa aking pagtatapos…”


Panglima naman ang aming bunso sa kanilang klase. Gusto niya na magakakasama kami sa pagsabit ng kanyang medalya kasi raw para sa amin talaga ang karangalan niyang makakamit. Nag-aral daw siyang mabuti para masama sa honor roll at pagbubutihan pa raw niya lalo sa mga susunod na taon para pagdating daw niya ng kolehiyo ay maging iskolar din siya ng UP katulad ko… Kahapon ang parangal pero wala ako doon para sa picture taking sana ng buong pamilya sa entablado. Nandito ako sa mainit at tigang na lugar na kung tawagin ay Cabuggao…nagpapakabayani.


Ano kaya ang sasabihin sa aking ng mga kapatid ko pag-uwi ko sa bahay. Ano kaya ang nangyari sa regalo ko sa kapatid ko. Ano kaya ang magiging epekto sa aming bunso ang hindi ko pagdalo sa araw ng kanilang parangal. Ano kaya…? Ano kaya…? Ano…? Ano…? Ano… ? Mga tanong na nanggugulo sa aking isipan. Parang ayaw ko nang umuwi… Pwede naman kasing pagkatapos na lang ng graduation ako pumunta dito sa Cabuggao.


Pero sa nila “you made a good decision Marvin.” Pero… hindi ko nararamdaman na I MADE A RIGHT DECISION!!!


Malapit nang humalik ang araw sa kabundukan pero wala pa rin kami sa aming paroroonan.


Hindi na ako napapagod sa paglalakad kundi sa paghihintay. May katapusan kaya itong maisan na nasa aming harapan? Sasabog na ang utak ko… gusto ko nang bumalik!!!


Pabagal na nang pabagal ang lakad ko. Wala na akong pakialam kung saan kami pupunta. Gusto ko mang bumalik ay hindi na maaari. Nandito na kami sa kung saan hindi na pwedeng bumalik. Malayo na kami at mas mahirap nang bumalik kaysa magsunod-sunuran na lamang.


Isa-isa na akong nauunahan ng aking mga kasama. Ako naman ang lumalanghap ng hangin na may halong alikabok. Hindi ko na nakita kung ilang na sila sa unahan ko. Hindi ko na sila makitang mabuti. Sinag ng araw na lumulusot na lamang sa mga alikabok ang aking nakikita. Maaninag ko man silang nasa harapan ko ay hindi ko rin sila makilala.


Patuloy ang paglakad…


Lakad…


Lakad. Halatang taga-lungsod ang aking mga kasama. Manghang mangha sila sa mga nakikitang kayumangging bundok, nanunuyot na kabukiran at naghihingalong maisan. Hindi pa raw sila nakakita ng ganitong kagandang lugar. Natawa na lang ako. Pero hindi malakas. Tumawa na lang ako sa loon ko. Hindi tawang masaya. Tawang naiinis. Bakit? HINDI KO ALAM!!!… Tumulo na lang ang luha ko…


Nakaupo na ang araw sa kabundukan. Malayo pa kaya kami sa aming patutunguhan? Sige lang, sunod lang.


Maya maya nangkaunti ay nagtakbuhan na ang mga nasa unahan. May mangilan-ngilan ding naiwan subalit mas mabilis na rin ang kanilang paglakad. May mga humahagibis na rin galing likuran. Sigawan na ang nangingibabaw. Sigaw ng pagkamangha, sigaw ng pagpupuri, sigaw ng pagod, sigaw siGAW, SIGAW. Iba-ibang sigaw. Hindi ko na napigilan sumigaw na rin ako…


Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa…..

Dance of Death

I was born in the world full of truths to discover. Truths that are so important to know for us to survive, not only to preserve our life but to have a happy life… a life free from pain.


I started searching the moment I learn to think. I began searching for those small truths that my small hand can hold. Those simple principles that my young mind can understand. And in my searching, I met some friends.


Pleasure is one of my favorite friends. I trusted him more than my parents and even my conscience for he always make me feel good. But nothing beats my friend Vanity for he makes me feel better than any other creature.


One of the things that I appreciate from Pleasure and Vanity is the dance that they taught me. The dance made me experience the things that people usually don’t experience. It made me go beyond my boundaries and made me fly and soar the skies and the heavens. Together, we dance. Together we fly and soar the skies and the heavens. Together we went to places. Places like triumph, satisfaction, fame and wealth. I love that dance.


But one day, I had a bad landing…


I fell into this prison called sin. I was badly hurt. My heart was wounded and from it flowed something called guilt. This place is a dark place. I can see nothing but guilt… and it is drowning me. This place is also a cold place. It makes just crouch in a corner and preserve any heat that I can preserve so that I can live.


With the help of the experiences I made a candle out of my god works. I used to light my dark world. It somehow gave me warmth that magnified my courage to go out of my corner and do something to get out of this prison.


I discovered that I am not alone in this place. There’s a lot of us here. Millions of us. They also have candles and theirs are shining far brighter than mine. So I blow their candle whenever I saw that theirs are shining brighter than my candle. But, I stopped doing it when I realized that blowing their candles wont make mine shine brighter.


My chance of having freed from this prison increased when I saw someone outside in this world enjoying his freedom who was living in this dark world before. I have no idea how he came out of this prison but maybe he knows the way out.


My candle has been burned out. Anytime now the cold will bite me until I die and then darkness will swallow me until my existence will totally erased. Unless someone will take me out of this world. I’m DYING… Heeeeeeeelp…

Wearing Rugs

Paborito ko iyong sando. Kaya lang, ayaw siya ng nanay ko. Ayaw niyang isinusuot ko siya. Dahil, una, lumalabas ang mala-kalansay kong katawan. Pangalawa, at sa palagay ko ay ang pinakadahilan kung bakit siya nagwewelga palagi kapag suot ko siya ay dahil mahirap itong labhan. Tuwing umuuwi ako sa bahay at suot ko ito, halos iisa lang ang aking naririnig. Iba ibang bersyon ng "Saan ka na naman galing?!!! Tingnan mo nga iyang suot mo… para na namang basahan!!! Palibhasa hindi kayo ang naglalaba!!!" Lahat ng maisip mong paraan para sabihin ang mga katagang ito ay nagawa na ng nanay ko. Mula sa napakalumanay hanggang sa napakatahimik pero nagngangalit ang titig. Pero alam mo, oks lang sa akin iyon noon dahil nanay naman siya eh. Isa pa, naniniwala ako noon na ang Diyos ay binigyan ang lahat ng anak ng tig-isang nanay upang magdisiplina kapag sila ay sobrang tigas na ang ulo. Nilikha ang mga nanay upang pagalitan ang mga makukulit na anak. Pero dapat tig-isa lang. Hindi na dapat hihigit dun dahil siguradong away yan. Kaya normal lang na magalit ang mga nanay sa mga tulad kong iresponsable. PERO… ibang usapan na iyan kapag nandiyan na nanggagatong at sisingit sa eksena si NANAY ROBOT… ang aking ATE. "Ang tamad tamad pa. Wala nang ibang ginawa kundi manood ng TV at maglakwatsa. Uuwi na lang kapag kainan na." At bubungisngis na sa likod ni nanay pagkatapos bumelat kapag sinimulan na naman ang mahaba at paulit-ulit na sermon. Haaay… sarap sipain!!!

Bago ko ma-slander dito ang ate ko ay balik na tayo sa topic. Dahil super duper mega hyper tired to death na ang nanay ko, take note, hindi sa paglalaba kundi sa walang nangyayaring pangungunsensiya niya sa akin, gumawa siya ng paraan. Isang paraan na taong mas matalino kay Eistein lamang ang makakaisip… GINAWA NIYA ITONG BASAHAN!!!

Ako naman ay super duper mega hyper shock to death nang nakita kong ginagamit ni nanay na pamunas ng mesa yung aking precious sando. Hindi ako nag-aksaya ng panahon. Gumamit ako ng "Hyperspeed Technique" (Isang teknik na halos isang libong taon bago na-perfect ng mga sinaunang Intsik. Ginamit nila ito sa paghabol sa mga dayuhang tumutukso sa kanila na sila ay singkit.) para agawin sa kamay ng nanay ko ang aking mahal na sando. AT AKO AY NAGTAGUMPAY!!! Feeling ko, isa akong superhero na iniligtas ang isang naaapi sa kamay ng masamang elemento. (Gusto ko lang sabihin na may moral lesson ito… hindi ko kayo niloloko) At siyempre hindi dun nagtatapos ang papel ng superhero. Nagbigay ako ng nakakatindig balahibong "Super Taray Titig" (isa namang teknik mula kay Sandra Go… isa rin yatang Intsik =>) bilang panghuling tira sa kalaban. Dahil dun, na-freeze ang kalaban ng ilang segundo, sapat na upang maitakas ang biktima sa ligtas na lugar upang labhan. (aay… wala pa palang pangalan ang ating pinakabagong superhero noh??? Alam ko na… siya na lang si ‘SUPERCUTE’!!!)
Pagkatapos kong labhan ang biktima ay siyempre isinampay ko dahil yun naman ang pinakalogical na gawin. Kahit hindi ka superhero na katulad ko ay ganun din ang gagawin mo diba? Masaya ako dahil oks na ang biktima. Balik na ulit siya sa normal na buhay. Pero… yun ang akala ko… May malagim na plano pala ang kalaban!!!…

Pagdating ko ng bahay galing sa lugar kung saan ako, aking mga barkada at si Christopher Columbus pa lang ang nakakapunta, nagulat ako sa aking nakita. MAY LUMAPASTANGAN SA AKING PRECIOUS SANDO!!! BUTAS BUTAS NA SIYA!!!

(WARNING: The following texts are not suitable for very young audiences. Viewers discussion is advised.)

Sabi ko na nga ba, may planong maghiganti ang kalaban. Ako kasi… hindi ko na lang sana siya pinabayaan. Sana binantayan ko na lang siya… Pagbabayaran niya ang kanyang ginawang pabubutas sa sa aking mahal na sando.

Habang tumutulo ang luha ng kababawan, iniisip ng ating bida kung paano binutas ni nanay ang sando. Naisip niya na maaaring gumamit ng kutsilyo o gunting o pana o baril o baka naman Jedi Knight na si nanay at ginamit niya ang kanyang ‘lightsaber ‘ upang butasin ang sando.Nag-ala Anakin Skywalker siya siguro at walang awang pinagtutusok ang walang muwang na damit. Ang OA namang si ‘Supercute’ ay patuloy pa rin ang pagluha.

(Drama naman) Pumunta sa harap ng salamin ang ating bida. Dahan dahan niyang inalis ang suot na damit upang isuot ang butas-butas na sando. Umikot muna siya ng isang beses. Naaliw siya kaya umikot pa siya. At umikot pa ng ilang beses… Tapos sumigaw ng …DARNA!!! …at walang nangyari… gusto lang niyang umikot.

Iikot pa sana siyang muli kaya lang naramdaman niya na medyo nakakahilo. Isa pa na-realize niya na wala saysay ang kanyang pag-ikot sa kwentong isinusulat ko kaya itinigil na lang niya.
Huminga siya ng malalim at pinag-iisipan ang susunod na gagawin. Ako naman ay nagmamasid lang. Bored na ako actually sa paghihintay sa susunod niyang gagawin. Pakiramdam ko ay hindi siya nag-iisip. Kapag ako nainis.. tatapusin ko ang kwento dito… Tingnan lang natin kung hindi niya pagsisihan ang kabagalan ng kanyang pagkilos… (…ayan, isinuot na rin ang sando. Buti naman… Sarap magparinig noh?!)

Mababaw talaga ang ating bida. Umiiyak na naman. Pero ngayon, may mga salitang lumalabas na sa kanyang bibig. Gusto niyang isigaw ang kanyang sinasabi kaya lang hindi ko siya pinayagan dahil baka isipin ng readers na baliw ang aking bida. Ang kanyang sinasabi ay may kahalong galit… matinding galit. (Paano ko nalaman??! Ako yung bida dito, remember?!) Mga salitang punong puno ng emosyon. Mga salitang kayang basagin ang salamin sa kanyang harapan. Mga salitang naiipon sa dibdib at parang apoy na lumalabas. (Actually hindi ko maintindihan iyong sinasabi ng ating bida kaya inilalarawan ko na lang. Bulol kasi. Parang hilaw na Intsik na ewan…I-fast forward natin ng konti. Bored na talaga ako sa part na ito.)
Narinig niya na may parating. "Si Nanay!" sabi niya sa sarili nang marinig niya ang hinihintay sa pagsaway kay Jacky, ang aming aso, sa pagharang sa daan… Lumalakas ang kalabog sa kanyang dibdib. Para ring may koryenteng dumadaloy sa dulo ng kanyang daliri papuntang braso… papuntang leeg… papuntang ulo… Pinapawisan na rin ang kanyang mga paa na nakayapak sa sementong sahig. Sinubukan niyang humakbang papunta kay nanay. Pero parang napakabigat ng kanyang paa. Sinubukan niyang iangat ang kanyang kanang paa… pero ayaw sumunod… POOOOoooot! (ayun! Lumabas din. Kanina pa pala nauutot. Hmmp. Bantot!)
Wala na.. lokohan na ba??? O sige seryoso na. Promise!)

Parang napakalayo ng paglalakbay. Ang takot sa maaaring mangyari sa nalalapit na paghaharap namin ni nanay ang naging dahilan kung bakit parang sampung taon ang aking paglapit… Parang ayaw ko na siyang harapin… pero huli na. Nagtagpo na ang aming mga mata.
Tiningnan ako ni nanay pababa… at ibinalik ang titig sa aking mga mata. Nahiya ako kaya iniyuko ko ang aking ulo. Habang ibinababa ko ang aking ulo ay nadaanan ng aking sulyap ang mukha ni nanay. Tahimik siya ngunit ang ekspresyon ng kanyang mukha ay sumisigaw ng "Bakit suot mo pa rin iyan?!!"… Pakiramdam ko ay napakabigat na ng aking ulo sa ginawa kong kalokohan. Pinagsisisihan ko na kung bakit ko pa isinuot muli ang sando… Naghari ng ilang sandali ang katahimikan.

Sinubukan kong muling tingnan ang kanyang mukha. Dahan-dahan kong inaangat ang aking ulo… Nang magtagpo ang aming mga mata, kapansin pansin ang pagbago ng ekspresyon ng kanyang mukha, mula sa napakatigas na punong–puno ng galit patungong naaawa at naluluhang mata… at siya ay tumalikod… at sabi ko sa sarili "YESSSS!!!"
Tuwang tuwa ako sa pagtalikod ni nanay dahil ibig sabihin ay ako ang panalo. Kahit hindi ko nagamit ang mga ikinabisa kong mga script kanina sa harap ng salamin ay ako pa rin ang nagtagumpay… Sori na lang siya. Nanay siya eh. Wala siyang magagawa. Tama man o mali ako, kailangan niya akong pagbigyan. Nanay nga siya eh. At kasalanan niya… bakit kasi mahal niya ako…

…Akala ko ako na ang panalo pero naiba ang takbo ng kwento sa mga sumunod na nangyari… Akala ko, ang pagtalikod ni nanay ay ang kanyang pagsuko niya sa aming laban. …Nagkamali ako. Tumalikod siya para kunin pala ang kanyang "secret weapon" na binili pa niya sa palengke. Pagharap niya sa akin ay kanyang iniabot ang isang supot. Pero ayaw ko na itong buksan nang nasalat ng aking kamay ang laman nitong damit… ako naman ang tumalikod… AKO ANG TALO!!!

…Ilang taon na ang nakalilipas, ipinaparinig pa rin ng aking alaala ang mga katagang "Bakit suot mo na naman iyan?!!!" May mga panahon na umaalingawngaw ito sa aking isipan at gusto kong iumpog ang aking ulo sa pader sa mga panahong ito. Ang magandang katapusan kasi ng kwento ay dinugtungan ko ng isang bangungot…

…Hindi ko tinanggap ang aking pagkatalo. Pakiramdam ko ay dinaya ako. Kung paano ako dinaya ay hindi ko alam… Basta gusto ko lang isipin na dinaya ako… Nang tumalikod ako, hindi ko nga binuksan ang supot. Inilagay ko ito sa aming aparador at taas noong lumabas ng bahay, suot pa rin ang butas butas na sando. At pag-uwi ko sa bahay, ang mga salitang "Bakit suot mo pa rin iyan?!!!" ang sumalubong sa akin…

Ayaw ko nang ikuwento pa ang mga sumunod na nangyari. Gusto ko itong kalimutan noon pa man pero ayaw akong lubayan ng aking alaala. May mga gabing umaalingawngaw ang mga katagang "Bakit suot mo na naman iyan?!!!" Kahit anong gawin kong pagtakip ng tenga ay patuloy ko pa rin itong naririnig dahil nanggagaling ito sa taguan ko ng galit sa isang sulok ng aking alaala. Isa lamang siyang maliit na kahon pero ang amoy na nanggagaling dito ay palaging nilalason ang aking katahimikan… Gusto ko na siyang tapusin … pero hindi ko alam kung paano…

Ilang taon muli ang nakalipas. Sa wakas natapos na ang kwento. Hindi itong kalokohang kwento kundi iyong "kwento". Ayoko nang gawing madetalye pa kasi ayaw ko ng telenobela. Basta… natapos ito noong pinakinggan kong mabuti ang mga katagang "Bakit mo na naman suot iyan?!!!" Isinulat ko ito sa papel at noon ko nalaman ang gustong sabihin ng nanay ko. Nandilat ang mga mata kong di pantay sa nakitang pagkakabaybay ng salitang ‘IYAN’: P-R-I-D-E !!!
Hindi ko na pinatagal ang kwento. Hinubad ko ang aking ‘sando’ at kinausap ko ang aking nanay… at isinuot ko ang bigay niyang damit na hindi mabibili sa kahit na saang palengke, ang kanyang mainit na yakap!